[THE PITCH]
for 5 November 1996. Updated every TUESDAY.
 


[Proposition 404]
 
BIG IDEA Stop frivolous websites!
 
25 WORDS <= By outlawing the more egregious
indulgences encouraged by the Internet,
Proposition 404 would eliminate wasteful
websites, saving jobs and taxpayer
bandwidth in the process.
 
HARD SELL Self-publishing is one of the cornerstones
of the Internet as we know it, but the
number of frivolous websites it has
encouraged waste so much taxpayer
bandwidth that the entire system has
become needlessly gridlocked. Prop 404
will protect taxpayers and boost the
economy by subjecting these sites to a
simple test: Does anyone give a shit?
Sites found wanting (likely suspects
include pet pages and diaries) will be
pulled off the web by a duly empowered
government agency, leaving the Internet
open for more serious pursuits. Those
responsible for the frivolous sites will
be given help finding jobs in more
productive sectors of the economy.
 
[Comic]
 
Prop 404 is favored by politicians,
businesses, and home users - nearly
everyone on the Internet. Only San
Francisco's South of Market coder crowd
is campaigning against it, claiming that
it interferes with their right to post
whatever they want. In reality, though,
Prop 404 limits only frivolous websites -
pages that have no place on the net
anyway. Don't let this special interest
group dictate public policy at the
expense of taxpayers and companies.
 
OVERHEAD Prop 404 calls for the creation of the
Bureau of Unnecessariness, a government
agency charged with deciding what
constitutes a frivolous website and
enforcing those guidelines. Start-up
costs for the Bureau will include
computers, equipment and some staff;
other staff members will come from the
ranks of those who have created useless
sites and want to work off their debt to
society. These expenses might seem large,
but they're almost insignificant compared
to the monetary drain put on the economy
by workers who run frivolous websites on
company time.
 

[Pitch Archive]

courtesy of
Dr. Dreidel