The Fish
for 15 June 1998. Updated every WEEKDAY.
Suck Staff

Joey Anuff
Joey Anuff
Editor in Chief


Terry Colon
Terry Colon
Art Director


[the fixin' pixie... ]
Emily Hobson
Production Manager
and Vice President
of Snacks


Heather Havrilesky
Heather Havrilesky
Senior Editor


[Ian Connelly]
Ian Connelly
Marketing Manager


[Copy Edit]
Copy Edit

Suck Alumni
Suck Alumni Text

Carl Steadman
Carl Steadman


Ana Marie Cox
Ana Marie Cox
Executive Editor


Sean (Duuuuude) Welch
Sean Welch


Owen Thomas
Owen Thomas
Copy Editor


T. Jay Fowler

Production Manager

& Ass Kicker


[yes, it's a plunger. i'll l
eave the rest up to your imagination ... ]
Erin Coull
Production Manager


Matt Beer
Matt Beer
Development Manager

A Modest Disposal

Subject: What violence is

Sheesh! Cherry pie, not apple
pie. And it wasn't Rap Brown
either, it was Stokely
Carmichael unless my aging
brain cells betray me.
Whatever. Doesn't anyone at
Suck ever look anything up?

Harry Eagar Maui

Well, you're half right. It
was cherry pie, not the more
traditional apple pie, that
H. Rap Brown compared
violence to. But it was in
fact H. Rap Brown who uttered
the immortal maxim! In any
case, I see no reason to
impugn my comrades at Suck
for a fruit error. You
ex-hippies are always
comparing cherries and
oranges. But I understand: my
brain cells are aging, too.

Hans Moleman

Fish With Letter Icon

Filler: Hate Mail


As a freind of Mr Mazuz' and
someone who is pretentious as
all git out, and a
ex-liberal-art major, I just
wanted to correct a error in
his letter; I make over than
25K a year.

P.S. And in the spirit of his
letter, I'll tell you that
for a living I'm an

P.P.S. I hate lemon squares.

Anthony Sarmiento

Are all of Mr. Mazuz's
friends pretentious? If any
more of his friends are
reading this, they should
write in and tell us how
pretentious they are and how
much they make.

In some (pretentious)
circles, they believe that
the less you make, the more
leeway you have to be
pretentious. Supporting this
claim are sculptors, slam
poets, and nihilistic coffee
clerks. Flying in the face of
this notion: the film and
music industries.

Today, mostly, we're left to
wonder: Who the fuck cares?


Fish With Letter Icon

A Modest Disposal

Thanks for the article on
violence, etc., today. But, as
much as we here in Oregon
would like to think Kinkel's
act took place in Eugene,
frat/sorority/college hell,
he actually lived in
Springfield. Close, but no
cigar. Were you going for
name recognition? If so, it
looked a little silly to
those of us who have been
following the news.

J. Castaldi

Surely you can't expect us to
distinguish between two small
towns in Oregon!

Our attention to detail has
been found wanting ever since
Owen Thomas stopped working
here. We've said it before
and we'll say it again:
Please lower your

Fish With Letter Icon

I read your article about the
15-year-old Miles Fox. He was
a good friend to me and I was
doing fine with his suicide.
Well, that was until I read
your page and was offended.
Some of the things that
offend me are "his nine,"
"was he old enough to read
Penthouse." And last of all,
I checked with the AP and the
comment "Lewis County
sheriff's Sergeant Brad
Borden told the Associated
Press, "It wasn't like she was
dumping him...." No she
wasn't, and, no, he didn't have
two girlfriends. It was that
he was going to go to a camp
over the summer and he wanted
to temporarily break up with
her for that period. That is
for unnamed reasons.

Rodney Myrup Good Friend of
the Deceased %-)

Okay, so, he was going to
summer camp, and he wanted to
temporarily break up with his
girlfriend, but it was HARD!
So he offed himself.

If we had known that, we'd
have had even more chances to
offend you.

Honestly, though, no one can
pretend to understand why a
particular teenager kills
himself or herself, because
most people can't remember
how bad things sucked at that
age. Suicidal teenagers just
have the misfortune of
believing that things will
never change. To them, we
say: Stick it out a little
longer, little fucks! At
least get a car and get laid
first before you decide.

Can you imagine things being
just as shitty as they were
when you were 15? If that
were the case, we'd have
killed ourselves a long time

Fish With Letter Icon

Overprofessional Hate


Regarding the letter by Elora
Raymond abusing the
overprofessionalism piece: At
first, I thought it was a
joke, a complaint either
composed by you guys or just
someone having too much fun.
Alas, after visiting Brown's
Web site and seeing some of
Ms. Raymond's posts, I
realized we were dealing with
a very serious person,
unfortunately corrupted by
some skewed ideologies. I
have nothing against Brown,
mind you, but it has been my
experience with various
attendees that they have
nothing to complain about at

However, the price of these
enviable positions often is
the inexplicable urge to
crusade for various causes,
some real and noble, many
imaginary and/or totally
alien to the crusader. Once
again, this is not a bad
thing either, but it can get
irritating at times. The
Filler on overprofessionalism
was on the money; I have met
too many people that aptly
fall into the stereotype you
portrayed (why are they
always in marketing? :) ).
The writer/illustrator has
every right to decide on the
layout of the strip and who
gets to be the butt of the
joke. In this case, you chose
a white woman and Ms. Raymond
decided to be offended by
that. You could have just as
easily opted to use an Asian
man or a Y-chromosomally
challenged (read that one
either way you want) person
of Native American ancestry
or a purple gay hermaphrodite
and someone would have a
gripe to voice. My answer?
People who take such easy
offense at these things need
to look beyond their good
intentions and personal
baggage and get over it. The
joke isn't mean spirited....
The only way it can imply
that women should stay out of
the workplace is because Ms.
Raymond decides she wants to
see it that way and then,
after all her rhetoric,
resorts to a personal attack
in an attempt to get her
point across.

Please, someone hand her a
clue; they're obviously in
short supply at many of
America's finer institutes of
higher learning.

Chris Watkins

It's a tightrope walk. Those
with an urge to effect change
tend to blow their alarmist
whistles too loudly and too
often. They also tend to be

Those with an urge to
chuckle, shrug, and keep
their senses of humor intact
tend to sit on their asses
too much without giving a
second thought to the ugly
injustices that surround
them. They also tend to eat
too many powdered doughnuts
in one sitting. I think it's
clear enough which category
we fall into.

The key is to get riled up
and chuckle inappropriately.
However, like eating powdered
doughnuts and working out
regularly, this combination
of behaviors is incredibly

Oh well. <chuckle

Fish With Letter Icon

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