The Fish
for 10 June 1997. Updated every WEEKDAY.
Suck Staff

Joey Anuff
Joey Anuff


Terry Colon
Terry Colon
Art Director


Ana Marie Cox
Ana Marie Cox
Executive Editor


T. Jay (the man) Fowler
T. Jay Fowler
Production Manager
& Ass Kicker


Heather Havrilesky
Heather Havrilesky
Senior Editor

Suck Alumni
Suck Alumni Text

Carl Steadman
Carl Steadman


Sean (Duuuuude) Welch
Sean Welch


Owen Thomas
Owen Thomas
Copy Editor


Matt Beer
Matt Beer
Development Manager

Dear Suck,

So why is Hopper's Nighthawks
kitsch, anyway? I agree that
it's overexposed, but that
doesn't make it kitschy in
and of itself. It's not
Hopper's fault that one of
his works became an icon, and
it's not stylistically or
thematically out of sync with
the rest of his paintings. Or
is it that you think all
Hopper is kitschy and
Nighthawks was just the
painting that became the
overexposed one? What you
guys need is an art critic to
write for you, and as it so
happens, I'm available.
Credentials? Hey, I went to
Swarthmore, dammit!

Srinivasan Sethuraman

You know, we sort of knew some
self-styled art lover was
going to dress us down for
misusing the term "kitsch."
Technically, of course,
you're right: The original
German term did apply more to
a sort of burbling-up of
cultural drek than the abuse
and overexposure of
particular images. Still,
Clement Greenberg's famous
1939 formulation of the term
has stuck in mainstream
consciousness ever since.
(Oh, and you can also blame
one of Greenberg's
Cézanne reviews from
the same period for the
contemporary notion of

Anyway, if you're a regular
Suck reader you must surely
know by now that we like our
put-downs cheap, kitschy, and
as mainstream as we can



Fish With Letter Icon

Mad about Ads

Subject: You have the most
annoying banner ad on the

the file mine shareware banner
is like having a highway
warning sign flickering on
and off in your face while
trying to drive ... or like
having every page of the
magazine you are trying to
read dipped in perfume.... do
away with it or lose your
most loyal reader ...

Mike Tronnes

We're regretful, yet not
apologetic. Annoying ad
banners are one of those
things that we'll have to
tolerate just as long as the
Web is more Las Vegas than
Bar Harbor. It will only
become the latter when Big
Money comes to town and
starts taking an interest in
"classing up" the "look" of
the place.

Fish With Letter Icon

Urban Hipster "Value" System

Thanks to your article, I have
seen the error of my ways. I
will now give my Doc Martins
away to charity, throw out my
favorite alterna-pop CDs, cut
my hair to above my
shoulders, and get a real
job, an IRA, HMO, and buy
some US savings bonds, as
well as finish my education
to improve my grammar.
Thanks, I couldn't have done
it without you. It must have
been, like, fate, or


Gianpaolo Baglione

It seems you were the only one
to understand or, you know,
"get" the message in the
Urban Hipster Value Meal
Filler. Donating Doc Marten's
and alterna-pop CDs is
certainly a good first step,
but have you also considered
contributing some of those
hipster clothes and
refinished, thrift-shop
furniture items? There are
plenty of underprivileged
hipsters out there who'd
really appreciate your
contribution. Also, when
you're done with that unreal
or surreal job, maybe you
could pass it on to a needy
hipster currently burdened by
the needless limitations of a
real job....


Fish With Letter Icon

I dig your sarcasm, but it's
pretty scary how many people
are unaccountable for their
actions. Have we as humans
really stooped to such a raw,
base level, that all we want
to do is to see how many
times we can screw (both
literally and figuratively)
others and get away with it?



Fish With Letter Icon


You folks are always clever
writers, but I prefer it when
you integrate your writing
and humor with a selection of
Web sites that back up your
main point or theme. I always
found Suck to be a great way
to find out what's happening
on the Web.

These humorous caricatures
(Urban Hipster, et al.) fall
short of the interactive
nature that you achieved with
your previous postings. I
could read this kind of stuff
in a magazine, but I can't
get the live Web links in a
magazine. I for one am losing
interest in Suck as these
kinds of columns replace the
older versions.

Just my two fresh fish for the
day.... Thanks for the past
... with hopes for the

Larry Laufenberg

"I could read this kind of
stuff in a magazine"? Which
one? Time? Buzz? Perhaps
Abrasives Magazine? Actually, the
harmonic convergence of media
justifies the general
solipsism of Suck in general,
but not in Filler.

Filler (which appears on
Wednesdays - there is a
pattern to the madness) will
not include such links,
generally, as I'm not exactly
sure what's happening on the
Web, nor am I exactly sure I
want to be more sure.

Fostering ignorance frees up
your schedule like you
wouldn't believe.


Fish With Letter Icon

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