for 7 September 2000. Updated every WEEKDAY.
|
|
Hit & Run
I was reading Suck and just when I clicked the JackinWorld link my roommates walked in and saw the page. Now they think I am weird. Thanks, Suck. Thanks a lot. Oh well. Off to watch that lucha libre (Mexican wrestling) tape I just got. apg <apg@uswest.net> It's best that they know the truth from the start, kids. Maybe you should back away from the computer and go eat some fried cheese with them next time. It's really best to make friends early in the semester, you know. Cut down on your media diet and start interacting with other humans. Do you really want to end up like us? We thought not. Sucksters  First of all, the Honeymooners didn't paint a bleak picture of domestic life at all - it was the world outside of the Kramdens' marriage that was bleak. Ralph had a low-paying job that required him to deal with irascible people all day long. He had little chance of ever getting the things he didn't have - responsibility in the form of being a boss, respect from Alice's mom, more money to have a nicer home. Ralph was a guy with big dreams, one who wanted to be important, who wanted people to look up to him, and who wanted to be able to provide for his wife. But his lack of education, refinement, and connections meant that the only way he could ever hope to better his lot in life was from too-good-to-true get rich quick schemes. The only things that WEREN'T bleak about life were domestic relationships -Ralph's friendship with Ed, and his marriage with Alice. It hurt Ralph deeply that he couldn't give Alice everything he wanted to, and so he tried myriad schemes to get rich. Alice fought with him because he didn't want him to jeopardize his job with risky ideas, and because she saw that Ralph was usually too prideful about things. Ralph fought with her because he was frustrated with life, and frustrated that the person "most in his corner" wasn't being supportive of him in his endeavor to provide for her.Eventually he would remember that his wife loved him for who he was, failings and all. The underlying premise of the show was that a passionate love between two people is what is most important in life, and is what sustains people when the outside world deems them unimportant. Bleak is two people in a loveless marriage, who care only for themselves and certainly not for each other (you know, the type of relationship you guys write about endlessly). Such people would never embrace in appreciation, love, and forgiveness as the Kramdens did virtually every episode. Lastly, Gleason and the writers made damn sure that Ralph was never portrayed as coming close to hitting Alice. Ralph loved her too deeply to consider it. Moreover, do you for a second believe that Alice would have stood for that?!? Alice moved out when he insulted her mother. She would never have tolerated any affront to her dignity, much less physical abuse. She never backed down from Ralph's yelling, instead standing toe-to-toe and demanding that her voice be heard and taken into account. It's amazing - Alice Kramden was a groundbreaking character who insisted with every ounce of strength that her husband not override her autonomy in the name of love, and not only are NOT extolling her, but you're casting her as a woman who would allow herself to be victimized. You've missed the entire nature of her character. Thanks for your time, Jeff Snow <JSnow@snl.com> You're right. Even if Ralph didn't love Alice too deeply to consider beating the shit out of her, Alice would never had stood for that. How could we have misjudged these fine people - er, characters - so badly? How could we not show more empathy for people - um, characters - who are obviously really struggling with some difficult issues? How could we mock such people - or, uh, characters - when they're clearly in pain, and desperately crying out for our help? You're a real character, Jeff. Let this be a lesson to you kids at home. That media diet is warping your mind. Unless you want to end up working for Saturday Night Live, you'd really better rethink your priorities. Sucksters Chickenhawk Down I'm sure I was at least as creeped out as you by Gore's deathbed narrative, but I think you're wrong to question his story about planting tobacco as a kid. As far as I know, he did spend summers on the farm in Tennessee as a kid (good photo ops for his senator dad). James Gibson <jgibson62@excite.com> I'm not questioning the fact that Al Gore planted tobacco as a kid, much as my instinct to never believe a word the man says wants me to. It's just that he tends to present a really selective personal history - gasp - so that, in his big convention speech, he noted that he'd studied religion at Vanderbilt, that he'd gone to Vietnam, and that he'd been an "investigative reporter," but neglected to mention those little temporary detours through Yale and St. Albans. Maybe he just forgot. He adjusts the narrative to suit the audience, is all. And he always drops the "g" on the end of -ing words when he speaks to what he perceives as working-class audiences: We're fightin' for the workin' man. Irritating. Uh, sorry: Irritatin'. I wonder if anyone else notices this? Paul Wellstone does it too. These are the kinds of things I notice, despite all those years of electroshock treatments. Please help me. Tired, Ambrose Beers Filler Dear Polly: Oh Polly Polly Polly. Oy Polly Polly Polly. You just don't understand. Jews are every bit as crazy as everyone else. It's just that we're allowed to drink. Indeed, we're required to drink. We've got special prayers for it. It's so basic to our faith that in Iran we've got special dispensation to make our own wine. (Iranian Jews tend to have lots of friends when the wine is ready.) Hell, we've got a major holiday on which we're required to get drunk. It helps. A lot. But don't go wacko and start praising Jewish food. As the dear late Zero Mostel so wisely put it, all that schmaltz has killed more Jews than Hitler. Alan S Kornheiser <ASKornheiser@prodigy.net> Jewish food no good? Clearly you've never been to Catholic mass. And let me tell you about what my family eats every Christmas, our traditional Eastern European Catholic meal. Turkey? Ham? Croissanwiches, all around? Nay. Raw garlic, lima beans, buns soaked in honey, sauerkraut, and prunes. Actually, it all sounds pretty good to me, right now. Anyway, you might be just as crazy as anyone else, but there's a big difference between letting that crazy out whenever you feel like it, and swallowing it back until you're stockpiling automatic weapons one day and you're not quite sure why. I mean, my stockpile is for the coming Apocalypse, but it took me years of therapy just to figure that out. Kvetching, but silently, Polly Dear Polly, While your assessment of my fellow tribesmen is in some measure accurate, I don't think you've quite got the full picture. You see, being a cutesy vulnerable man in a culture of bossy demanding women is horribly frustrating and at length, soul crushing. Young Jewish men like myself often flee their claustrophobic families, drink heavily, and date schikses ranging from the ever so slightly tweaked (usually half-jews) all the way to the unhinged (usually catholic). Well some do. I guess the other ones become dentists and call their mothers once a week. What I'm saying is, it's very complicated, but hey, what isn't? Thanks for amusing me. I'm going to go eat breakfast now. Then I'm going to call my mother. Jonathan Newman <newmanj@chass.utoronto.ca> Yeah, yeah, you flee your families, screaming loudly, but then get back just in time for dinner. I know all about it. Far better to complain loudly, flee, rebel, date stupid goys, and return refreshed and ready to stay with your tribe from that day onward, than to seethe quietly, pretending to enjoy your family, all the while never telling them what you really think or want, until one day you realize what that stockpile of weapons is for. Well, that's what MY stockpile is for, but hell, it took me several really strong acid trips just to figure that one out! Polly Ok...got a really good laugh out of this one about Jews having the coolest emotional make up ... here's a good Jewish family story ...Last thanksgiving there's a huge fight with my brother and my mother, I get involved and my brother and I practically come to blows ...he storms out of the house...and then the next morning, he and Mom go out to breakfast and everything's fine... My nice Jewish wife (who is easy on the eyes) was even shocked at this one. Jesus Christ! Ken Kadet <Kadetk@fleishman.com> Nice one! Thank god you're Jewish and not a repressed Wasp or a Catholic, because what if that fight broke out and your brother had a stockpile of weapons in his basement like I do? MY stockpile is for killing really big insects, but it took me a divine visit from God himself to uncover that mystery. Hail Mary! Polly |
|
||||||||||||||
 |
||||||||||||||||
   |
||||||||||||||||
 |  |
|||||||||||||||
 |   | |||||||||||||||
![[Tim Cavanaugh]](/fish/staff/images/tim.gif)
![[Phillip Bailey]](/fish/staff/images/phil.gif){kind=small}
