BRANDED FOR LIFE
Remember Martha Stewart's recent declaration? "It's hard being a
living brand... with people pointing at you. I don't like that."
[Advertising Age, 10/14/96]
Did it leave you wondering if you're a living brand? Take this
quiz and find out!
1. Your spouse keeps making artichokes for dinner. You hate
artichokes. What do you do?
a) Say to your spouse: "Stop making artichokes for dinner. I hate
b) Politely suggest a green and healthy alternative, like
broccoli, or okra!
c) Save those uneaten artichokes until you have enough to string
together into a small wreath. Then you just snap off the
discolored edges, and voila! A fresh, decorative ornament that'll
add a holiday touch to any living space!
2. You've recently won a local tennis tournament, and the press is
swarming around you. You've never felt the harsh glow of the
spotlight, and you find it quite disconcerting. What do you do?
a) Ramble on aimlessly about yourself until even the press hounds
become visibly bored and wander off.
b) Tell the reporters you hate them, the whole bloody lot of them!
c) Pull out your personal calendar for the month and show those
journalists exactly when you plan to winterize the Begonia patch
in your backyard.
3. You're beginning to notice that your bar of soap is always the
smallest one in the house. What do you do?
a) Scream at your housemates: "Stop using my soap, you moochers!"
b) Call the company that makes the soap and say: "Hey, your soap
is always the smallest soap in the house." Then feel bitter when
they turn it into an award-winning ad campaign without giving you
c) Take your soap and all the other small soaps in the house and
heat them in a saucepan, on high for about 12 minutes or until all
the soap is melted. Then add a few drops of food coloring and pour
them into a variety of molds. What an easy, inexpensive, colorful
gift for friends and family alike!
If you answered 1. c, 2. c, 3. c, you're a Living Brand!
Congratulations! Get your name trademarked and find an agent,
If you answered anything else, you're either a dead brand, or a
living non-brand. Either way, you don't matter. Shut up. Go away.