"a fish, a barrel, and a smoking gun"
for 30 August 1999. Updated every WEEKDAY.


As we commence our four-years-deferred summer vacation, the Sucksters are nonplused at the sorry state of vacationing's main function — putting some good old entertainment into your life. Frankly, the glut of "infotainment" and "edutainment" media has left little room for our own favorite diversion: "irritainment." Submitted for your delectation are four of Suck's most exciting journeys to the pastime paradise. If you're looking for the kind of sight-and-sound sensory underload that Suck provides at reliable 14.4 speeds, click no further than Rhyme and Reason, our salute to TV's greatest theme songs. More scientifically minded folks will want to peruse Smoke Out, an occasionally accurate look at how those box office high-flyers manage to get so, well, high. And true starfuckers get a double dose with Vodka on Ice, our always timely look at the always troubled career of a fine actor, and the Dancing Baby Boom, starring everybody's favorite virtual embarrassment.

courtesy of the Sucksters