S U C K

"a fish, a barrel, and a smoking gun"
for 23 December 1997. Updated every WEEKDAY.
 

 
In 1998 ...
 

There will be a grass-roots campaign by Web TV users (quietly funded by Digital Equipment Corporation) to reign in "Web sprawl" through a few minimum basic standards. The movement's first solution will be the standardized homepage. All Web users will henceforth be required to use the same "Welcome to My Homepage" logo and can choose from among 25 photos of family, friends, and pets; a set of 50 favorite links; 75 favorite X-Files episodes and residents of Springfield; and 100 favorite '80s memories. GIFs and text will be provided for a nominal fee by the Fox Network. Attempts to shut down all personal pages that do not fit the standard will prompt a rebellion among libertarians who circulate a floating homepage meme. You will be asked to support this rebellion.

 

 

courtesy of the Sucksters