SHORT AND HOPELESSLY EXAGGERATED
"If The Graduate were to be remade for the late '90s, the single word of advice imparted to Benjamin would be 'information.' Such, in any case, is the popular notion, although in the short run it is hopelessly exaggerated." [Nathan Myhrvold, The New Yorker, 10/27]
Polly: Have you considered a job at Cosmopolitan?
Ana: Have you considered becoming a cosmonaut?
Polly: You could sell Mary Kay Cosmetics.
Ana: You could contemplate the cosmos.
Polly: You should contemplate cosmetic surgery.
Ana:You should contemplate suicide.
Polly: I could contemplate homicide.
Ana: You could write for "Homicide."
Polly: You could guest star on "Murder She Wrote."
Ana: You could write to Cornelia Guest.
Polly: You could befriend a cornish hen.
Ana: You could hen-peck a corny friend.
Polly: That's what I'm doing.
Ana: That's what you wish you were doing.
Polly (pointing to ugly guy): That's who you wish you were doing.
Ana: He wishes he could do me.
Polly: He wishes he were Hong Kong Fooey.
Ana: He wishes he knew the words to "Louie, Louie."
Polly: He wishes he were less hairy.
Ana: He wishes he were surprisingly cranberry...
Next week ... Tune in for more fascinating glimpses into the formation of a groundbreaking new culture!