BIRDSHIT BY BIRDSHIT

Look out for these clues that your writing is bad!

 

 
  1. Only online magazines will publish it.

  2. Your favorite subjects are Why Your Last Relationship Sucked, Why Your Last Job Sucked, and Why You Love Coffee.*

  3. You cover your newspaper's "What's Hot Online" beat.

  4. You're trying to emulate Ernest Hemingway.

  5. You're trying to emulate Jack Kerouac.

  6. You believe in "experimenting with unchartered formats."

  7. Your name is John F. Kennedy Jr.

  8. People say your writing reminds them of slam poetry.

  9. Your writing instructor suggests a career in technical writing.

  10. Your writing instructor suggests you submit your work to Swing magazine.

  11. You're the editor of Swing magazine.


*Unless you have an illustrator named Terry Colon who makes things look funny and interesting when they're not.

 

Next ... Translating Writerspeak into English!

 
 
 
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