Upon reflection, some of you aren't going to be too happy about the simple fact that the fall of the online empire means one thing for you:


Kind of a harsh word, isn't it? Sure, you'll have a hard time leaving your corner office with a view only to pull lattes for executives who look just like you did back in the golden age of the Web. Yet, when you really look at the facts, all that's standing between you and your new career is - yeah, you guessed it:


At Suck, we've used our vast understanding of the human psyche to develop a special visualization technique for those of you suffering from the burden of too much pride.


Step One

Picture yourself on the top of a huge mountain, in a golden castle, surrounded by jewels and fine clothing and those almond-cranberry scones you just love! Think about how great everything is. Breathe the fresh air. Take a bite of the scone. Mmm! Yummy.

What's that sound? It's a knock at the door! Oh, look. It's your piss boy, telling you it's time for your daily stress-relief backrub. Ahhh. Doesn't that feel nice?


Step Two

Now picture yourself in a modest office building, the jewels and fine clothing are gone, and it kind of smells bad because they're re-tarring the roof next door. Outside, you see the view of another building just like the one you're in. It's kind of cloudy. The bran muffin on your desk is crumbly and dry.

There's a knock at the door.... It's Jon Katz! You're late for his daily backrub.

Now wasn't that a grounding experience? Remember, just when you think you've lost all your pride, you've still got more pride to lose! So get used to it.


Next ... Find out what happens when the Sucksters are laid off!

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