This is a test:

Imagine that you're head of

production for a major Hollywood

flick. The concept is

Charlotte's Web-meets-Look Who's

Talking Now with a little

"existentialism" thrown in to

meet the demands of today's

times. It could be a goldmine -

the star is a pig, and who can't

relate to that?

Here's the problem: you've got a

minuscule window of time in

which to film your star, limited

to weeks 16 to 18 of his short

but star-studded existence.

Three weeks being preposterously

inadequate to finish shooting,

you sagely solve this dilemma by

training 48 piglets on a

staggered schedule.

Which leaves you, in the

unavoidably grim post-production

stage, at the following

crossroads -

Do you: