S U C K

"a fish, a barrel, and a smoking gun"
for 25 October 2000. Updated every WEEKDAY.

Filler 10.25.00



DANCES WITH YUPPIES

Our fearless anthropologist explores the mysterious tribal rituals of the urban yuppie!



If you're introduced to a group of yuppies, the first thing your friend in the group will do is try to demonstrate to the others why you're important enough to be included in their exalted ranks. Make sure to lie freely.





Next, the yuppies in the group will poke around halfheartedly, trying to determine if you're really so super important, in that almost-sneering faux-sincere way — while taking every opportunity to kiss each other's asses blatantly and repeatedly.





Naturally, you'll respond by gloating cheerfully.



Next...Major, major players.